The avoidance of pain; this easily becomes a driving factor in our lives.
It makes good sense that we don’t want to feel pain. After all, it really doesn't feel great, does it? When it comes to emotions, there are feelings that we enjoy and feelings that are painful. Despite this, feelings are simply vibrations in our body. This is in contrast to a painful sensation that comes from our nerves, like when you put your hand on a hot stove. In other words, painful emotions are different than physical pains. Our brain doesn’t always discern the difference- we established that last week.
This week we’d like to help you to feel the pain. When we bury, push away, or hide our emotional pain, we’re inadvertently doing the same to our pleasant emotions.
Slowing down may give you time to realize that you’re not experiencing pain from a sensation, but from a vibration. I like to think of it in terms of pain that is ‘life and death,’ and pain that is ‘simply emotion.’ Once we understand that the pain we’re experiencing is an emotion, we can understand that we don’t need to move away from it like we would when our hand is on that hot stove. We can name it; giving it a name allows us to recognize what’s there. And we can feel it; truly feeling emotional pain allows us to process it. When we don’t do this, we spend so much energy running from the pain of the emotion.
Let’s talk a bit more about feeling it- feel it in the moment, right when you’re experiencing it. Find it and focus on it. Where is it in your body? Is it sharp or dull? Black or red? Heavy or fluid? Cry through it if need be. You see, when you feel it, see it, & allow it, you process it. And when you process it, your brain begins to realize it isn’t a danger. It is okay to feel safe. We aren’t ever going to remove all pain from our lives. Emotional pain is here to stay. When you learn how to process through it, you create freedom for your life. Freedom to move into places that evoke emotional pain within us. What are the possibilities that open up when you can walk into emotional pain knowing that whatever it is, you can handle it? Because whatever it is, you can handle it!